What Drives You?

We often get so caught up working for the next goal, the next client, or the next project that we never take the time to consider what we really want. We are so caught up thinking about what we don’t have that we forget why we’re pushing so hard. Yes, money, and yes, bills, but in my experience, there is a deeper thing that drives us. A reason beyond the money. But often, this goes unacknowledged. At least, it was for me until I took a little pilgrimage to New Mexico.

Let me explain.

When I first started building my business, my sister asked me to do her a favour and drive her car from Colorado to Montreal. I considered it a great opportunity for a road trip and decided to make the most of the trip and take a detour to Taos, NM.

I know, it sounds random, but I’d heard about a temple in Taos where people had had experiences and gained insight. So, I made a point to head there before driving across the country.

When I got to the temple, I sat down in front of this life-size statue of Hanuman, the Hindu deity who helps people achieve success in this life so they can continue their personal development, and silently asked for advice concerning my business.

And then, though it might not seem extraordinary, a clear version of my own voice rang through my mind and asked the most direct question: what do you want?

Even though it wasn’t what I wanted an experience to be, and it seemed to be nothing more than my inner voice, I had come so far that I decided to have an honest conversation with myself. And so I said, I want to help people.

H: Yes, yes all well and good, but that’s not the whole truth. What do you really want?

Me: want to make a living doing right by others.

H: Ok…that’s great, now come on, what do you really want?

Me: I want to be successful.

H: Almost there.

Me: Ok, I want to make a good amount of money.

H: Why? Why do you want to make a good amount of money?

Now this I had to think about. It always seemed so obvious that I had never really considered why I wanted money. So, I went with the obvious.

Me: I want to have nice things and pay my bills without struggling to survive.

H: Ok…and beneath that?

Me: Safety? I want to feel more safety.

H: Ok…why?

And then the answer chimed loud and clear: peace of mind.

Me: I want peace of mind.

H: Bingo!

With that realization, not only did I see that yes, I needed money to feel that peace of mind I was looking for, and personally, I needed to earn it in a way that aligned with my values, but I also recognized that if peace was what I really wanted then I had to find a way to make money while maintaining that very peace of mind.

Yes, I needed more to feel safe, but I couldn’t do so at the cost of my peace of mind because if I did, I would be keeping myself from the very thing I was working towards.

Now, this isn’t to say that everyone needs to be looking for peace. But to my mind, to avoid burning out, you need to reflect on why you’re working so hard. Because only then can you make sure that you aren’t sacrificing what you want to make the money you need to purchase it.

In the end, this is a question of balance. How much work is enough and at what point do we see diminishing returns?

So, what are you working for? What do you want beyond the money? This is the big question. It’s not to say stop working for the money; it’s just to encourage you to gain clarity on why you’re pushing so that you can strike that balance.

Be radically honest with yourself. Get to the root of it: is it peace, is it power, is it to feel good, to be a good partner, father, mother…to help others? Then, go deeper and ask yourself, “Why?”

And whatever it is, make sure the way you pursue it doesn’t cost you the very thing you’re working for. Because if you lose sight of the goal beyond the money, no amount of effort will ever lead you to feel fulfilled.